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Almost three and a half years ago we had a beautiful little boy named Hosea Nathan.  He was perfect in every way!  After two girls, you can imagine all of our excitement!  One month later, Hosea passed away from SIDS–Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.  This earth-shattering tragedy rocked me to the core.  There were days I thought I would never see the light again…I thought I would never laugh or smile or be able to enjoy anything again (Picture at right by Julie Buckman with JellieBeanz Photography).

Losing a child is something that is impossible to explain to someone who has never walked this dark road. I ache for other mothers and fathers who know the pain of such a deep  loss.  You literally lose a piece of yourself.

I’m writing about him today because I think we are all thinking about him a lot these days. For some reason when the weather changes to fall, I think we all think of him even more.  There are so many fun things on the horizon…hay rides, PumpkinFest, trick-or-treating, the girls birthdays, daddy’s birthday, Thanksgiving, Christmas, and my birthday…all between now and the end of the year!  It is like one big party once October hits!  But I think I am also reminded of how much I miss having a three year old little boy to enjoy the festivities with us!

But here we are, almost 3 1/2 years later and I can say that we have learned to live, laugh and love again. Our family misses Hosea terribly–the girls still talk about him almost on a daily basis. He is and forever will be a part of our family. But I am so thankful for the incredible healing we have walked through over the past few years and for an amazing husband who has been the glue of our family.  His faith and fight kept me moving forward to. I am thankful for Get Free Stay Free Ministries and all they have done for our family!

The girls can not wait for the day they go to heaven and get to play with Hosea.  They often imagine what he is doing and what they will do with him when they get their.  Eden says she will jump on clouds with him.  Micaiah wants to have a HUGE mansion next to his.  She thinks that he has saved all of the balloons we have ever sent him and that they are in his mansion waiting for her!

The girls love to get balloons, kiss them or write notes on them, and send them of to “heaven” for Hosea to have.  On his birthday we like to buy big bouquets of balloons and send them off one at a time!

Meet the little guy!